Kissed by Insecurity

Nothing in this world is permanent; neither the people nor the circumstances. Everything just flows as if there are no hurdle; no barriers.

Life is like a river. It passes through ups and downs. Kisses flowers and thrones... Becomes dirty and may also lose its original sheen. Yet it moves. It keeps moving until it unifies with death – like the river that merges with the mighty ocean.

May be that’s why they say, till the death part us!

But, they also say that death is not the end. It is the beginning of a new life, in a new form. May be death will take us to people with whom we always wanted to be with. Death might help us escape from the mundane and absurd life that we were leading.

As I think deeper, I realize that fear of death has never caressed me. Instead I have always been shackled by insecurity. I know, nothing is permanent and that we are like rivers running towards the final destiny. I also know that permanency is an illusion and not a reality. Yet I feel insecure.

Insecure about people... work... circumstances... relationships... and at times even myself!

When insecurity takes me over, I stare at the vacuum and wonder does everybody feel the same like I do. I wonder if insecurity creeps within each one of us; each one of you.

If you say yes, the insecure-uncertain-confused human being would feel overjoyed!

But if you say no, the ardent thinker, the in-depth-analyser, the philosopher, the-writer-with-a-self-proclaimed crazy mind would be happy!

I count the person I am and the writer within as two different contradicting characters because most of the times I write about what-if than what-is...

Confusing?

Well, same here.

I had read somewhere that writing your heart and thoughts out would bring clarity.

In my case, it is leading to post after post... and the pondering continues...

Is it for an eternity, I wonder. I shudder!